In my ever increasing desire to learn more unusual skills to add to my act I decided to work on fire eating. This isn't exactly the sort of thing you just decide to try on a whim. There's a math professor here at the U of R that I knew was a fire eater. When I expressed an interest in learning this from him he was more than happy to teach. He even gave me some fuel, 180 proof vodka, to take home so I could practice. Of course, the vodka didn't last all that long and it was time to buy some more.
I walked down the block to the liquor store. Since I don't drink and I had never been in a liquor store before I wasn't quite sure what I was looking for. Apparently it was rather obvious to the owner of the store that I felt a little uncomfortable. Being the friendly sort of person that he was, he asked if he could help me out.
"Yes," I answered rather hesitantly because, although I knew what Nick had given to me before to use, I was still trying to figure out if there was something better. "I want the strongest stuff you've got."
That was mistake number one. You can probably imagine the look on the store keeper's face. "That stuff over there. Everclear vodka." He turned and walked back to the register.
"This is only 160 proof. The stuff I had before was 180. Don't you have anything stronger."
Another shocked look. "It's illegal in New York to sell anything stronger."
"Oh well. I guess it'll have to do." You can see at this point that I wasn't making a very good impression. This guy seemed to really be wondering about me, so I quickly tried to correct the situation and said, "well, it's not like I'm going to drink the stuff." That was my second big mistake. Now I've got the attention of other people in the store.
"I have no idea what you're going to do with it, but it certainly burns well."
"Bingo," I reponded.
Oops. Heads turned. I knew I had no choice but to explain what I wanted this for before everyone there got the impression that I was going to shove a sock in it and light it. As soon as I explained, there were a few audible sighs and one request for a demonstration. I had to turn down the request to do fire eating since I didn't have my wand with me and the middle of a liquor store probably wouldn't have been the best place anyway. I did however spend another half hour in the store making balloon animals and handing out business cards. Just a week ago I even got a call from one of the people in the store that saw me. I guess it pays to make a scene sometimes.